Recently I spent some time with a girl friend who is near and dear to my heart. She is older than I am, and someone that I can hang with and be my truest self. This time we were spending ALOT of time (like 9 hours) in the car going to a wake. These things are never fun, but you need to support your family and partner even when you don’t want to make that type of a drive. Being in the car that long allows you to really get to know someone and I made a discovery that has been haunting me ever since.
You see, this girl friend is stuck in her ways and not only is she stuck, she doesn’t even know how much happiness she is missing out on. Worse than that, she is actually TURNING AWAY ALL OF THE OPPORTUNITIES the Universe has for her – and basically saying “HELL NO!” to whatever good stuff comes her way. Here is how the conversation went. (Two important items: 1) She lost her husband 12 years ago which lets you know how much time has gone by – just so you have a backdrop for the story. 2) She goes to the same vacation island year after year and never deviates or visits any other place on the planet.)
Me: “Hey, have you ever considered going to another vacation spot?”
She: “NO!” Answers very quickly and with authority.
Me: “Why not, there are so many beautiful places to see?
She: “No, I like it where I’m at.”
Me: Umm, ok.” A little later on as she is going on and on about her late husband – “Have you ever thought about getting to know other people as potential partners? I mean you are still young and you could live another 40 years.”
She: “NO! I’m not interested in sex! (Really mean and snippy).
Me: “I didn’t say anything about sex! I was thinking about companionship. You know, someone to talk too. It might be nice to have another person that you could have fun and do things with”.
She: “NO, he was the one and that is that!” (Pretty much that is that and we will speak no more on this subject you idiot – is the vibe I got).
Me Thinking: “Okayyy,” and I thought where do I go from here which basically went nowhere. I just stopped talking.
(To be fair here, I understand that she lost her spouse and I do believe that you only have one true soul mate. However, you are still here on this planet and living and if you are going to be here for quite a long time, it might be nice to have someone to talk too.) And that’s the way the trip went. Not only was she super bossy, more importantly, I really wondered if she was even listening to what she was saying to me. All of the answers came fast and sharp – like the wicked sharp end of a knife – WITH NO WIGGLE ROOM FOR CHANGE as part of the package. So, I sat there and thought: WOW! She is LITERALLY PUSHING AWAY ALL OF THE ABUNDANCE, WEALTH, OPPORTUNITY, AND WAYS TO MEET AMAZING PEOPLE AWAY. She is not just saying No to the Universe – she is saying “HELL NO!” I want no change in my life. Are you like this person? Are you pushing away prosperity that could already be yours if you had only said Yes instead of No?
So many of us are preprogrammed to say things that we have inherited from other people – like our parents. Things like “I’ll never make enough money too” or “There’s never enough to go around” or even better “I will never have enough”. What do you think the Universe hears? The only job the Universe has is to GIVE. However, it will give you what you put out there energetically and what you say. Your words and thoughts have true power so when you say “No, I don’t want anyone new to walk into my life” the Universe hears that and says “OK! she does not want anyone new to talk too” and you will stay lonely.
I don’t want anyone to push the gifts that are RIGHTFULLY YOURS away. You need to think about what your saying and listen to the words that come out of your mouth – especially if they are unconscious. If you are not getting opportunities, abundance, wealth, new paths to be successful and happy – chances are you may be saying things like my friend was saying – which is a big, fat NO!
In the next couple of posts, I am going to talk about how to get yourself out of this predicament AND I have also cooked up something special – a couple of webinars complete with free worksheets on how to have more wealth and abundance in your life. Look for that later on this week. In the meantime your assignment is this: Really listen to where you are saying No too in your life and each time you say it – write down when you said it and what you said No too. It can be something as easy as “Do you want to go to lunch? No. Do you want to meet my new friend? No. Those are both opportunities that you just said a big fat No too. It does not matter how small the perceived opportunity is. Maybe you go to lunch with someone new and you form a friendship that really turns into something wonderful and prosperous.
Let me know what you are saying No too and I will soon give you ways to turn that around to a a “HELL YES! Abundance and wealth – here we come!”
To Your Most Abundant Life Ever!